Good Eats at the TEOTWAWKI Café—Guacamole

 The house I grew up in was situated in a subdivision that had previously been an orange grove.  We had several citrus trees still on the property as well as one very large avocado tree.  And thus began the family’s love affair with guacamole.

We’ve all learned to make guacamole well, just like the other staples of our Mexican heritage—tortillas and refried beans.  But in every family, one person somehow becomes the expert, the designated guac maker for any gathering.  When the kids were ready to take over some of the meal prep, my sister Lisa became the guacamole guru.  Her daughter, Annie, is now the guacamole queen in Lisa’s family; QOTPE reigns supreme in mine.  I think her motivation to ascend to the throne was entirely selfish; she hates onions (the texture, not the flavor) and the only way to get onion-free guacamole was to make it herself.  And everyone in the family agrees that her guacamole is the best.  Unfortunately, guacamole is one of those family recipes in which the ingredients are never measured—just a sprinkle of this and a pinch of that, so nailing QOTPE down to get some more precise measurements was essential.  And here it is:

QOTPE’s Guacamole

2 large avocados, peeled and mashed

1 teaspoon oregano

½ teaspoon cumin

¼ teaspoon garlic powder

¼ teaspoon onion powder

¼ teaspoon salt

Mash everything together.  Serve immediately.

Of course, being a subtropical tree (it grows in zones 9-11 in the US), avocados don’t grow in most of the country; most of us won’t have access to fresh avocados in TEOTWAWKI.  And that is truly unfortunate.

But all is not lost!

While instructions for freezing and dehydrating avocados abound on the internet, the result isn’t that great.  Canning them is completely out of the question.  They can, however, be freeze-dried.

Good sauces and dips may not be essential to good eats in TEOTWAWKI, but they sure won’t hurt.  Good food can compensate for a multitude of difficulties in life that we’ll encounter in the days ahead.  And one of those dips that I wanted to make sure we had was guacamole.

So when the family bought a freeze dryer a few years back, I had a chance to try out lots of foods that we couldn’t preserve in any other way.  When store-bought guacamole (kind of an abomination in my opinion) at my local grocery store was short-dated and deeply discounted, I bought enough to run a load through the freeze dryer.  I did the same when Smith’s discounted a case of fresh avocados.  (I never figured out why they were discounted—they were in beautiful condition.)

The commercially made guacamole freeze dries and then reconstitutes perfectly.  It’s virtually indistinguishable from its freshly made counterpart.  With the additives and preservatives, it’s not our favorite, but beggars can’t be choosers.  And we don’t use very much with tacos, burritos, and tamales, so it’s ok. 

Avocados must be thinly sliced to freeze dry well.  They can also be mashed and spread thinly on the trays.  Due to the high fat content, chunks will not work at all and the freeze dryer will often indicate that a load of avocado chunks is complete, while examination after removing the trays reveals that the chunks are still wet inside.  Freeze-dried avocados make pretty good guacamole, not quite the same as fresh, but definitely acceptable.